Happy Tuesday, Blog Framily! I hope you’ve had a wonderful three weeks! I have been enjoying my birthday... The big 45. I paused for a minute to let that sink in (I've been letting it sink in for the past 3 weeks...).
I am truly grateful to God for allowing me to have 45 years
on this side and to experience all parts of life, the good, the bad, the
ugly!!! Because, face it, it is all parts of life that have shaped me into the
me of today (the good, the bad and the ugly…).
Here’s a recap:
I was born – May 25, 1971!
Not born under the ideal circumstances at the time, but I was born. Here’s a baby picture, not newborn, we had a
fire and my baby book was destroyed, but an infant photo just the same:
And I was given the blessing of being raised
by my maternal grandparents, who were to me, simply “Gramma and Gran-deddy”
(you have to get that phonetic pronunciation going).
I attended an awesome preschool at Triedstone Full Gospel
Church, where I learned to read very early and my love of reading was born (I
was reading my mom’s books when I was in kindergarten)! This is where I had my first graduation; I
still remember us singing and performing “10 little Indian boys and girls” (I
had forgotten that, it just came back to my remembrance today). Here’s a picture of my graduation, it’s from 1976:
I attended Bates School (which no longer exists) where I had
some awesome teachers that recognized my academic potential and jumped me after
a week or two in first grade to second grade.
It was at Bates where I met some folks that would become eternal
friends, where I developed my abhorrence for chocolate (milk, ice cream,
pudding, frosting, egh!), where I was encouraged to just keep reading and
writing, where my fear of worms and dogs was tested to new heights, where I had
my first fight and my first crush. It
was also at Bates School where my 5th grade teacher recommended that
I (along with 3 other students) go to Kellogg School to be part of the options
for knowledge program, a move that changed my life.
1981 found me being bussed to Kellogg and it was such an
important part of my life journey! I was
in the options program in 6th grade, and it was there I learned to
research and really develop my writing.
It was a small school, only one class for each grade, and we were
relatively close. My graduating class
had 32 people in it! It was there I had
access to physical science and biology classes, made lifetime friends,
participated in “teach-ins” and plays, went to the opera, and was exposed to
different things outside of my neighborhood, like a progressive dinner (which I
SHALL recreate one day!). I wish I had
pictures, but we were busy living life, not photographing it! I do have some pictures from my 8th
grade graduation; this is one with me with my mom back in 1984 after the graduation:
The next phase of my life was high school; from 1984-1988, I
was an Honors Student at Morgan Park High School right on the south side of
Chicago! There I started my 4-year
journey with a small group of students who were in the Honors Track with me and
met some others along the way; again, lifetime friendships were formed. It was there that I had experimental haircuts
(asymmetrical bob, anyone?), survived neon and an obsessive fascination with
pink during 1985, went on college tours, had sleepovers, played sports, went on
dates (once I was old enough), learned how to drive, had my first heartbreak,
had my first job (Brown’s Chicken on 116th & Western), had many
excursions to Evergreen Plaza, and enjoyed the heck out of my senior year,
including prom. Those were some of the
best years of my life!!! Here is my "official" senior year book picture:
After that was college; from 1988-1992 I was a student at
the University of Illinois in Urbana –Champaign, where I attended on full
scholarship. It was there that I joined
my sorority (Sigma Gamma Rho Sorority, Inc.), learned that I actually needed to
STUDY to get good grades, traveled up and down I-57 more times that I can
count, gained and lost the freshman 15, went on road trips, learned to truly
live on my own, lost my grandfather (1992, 3 weeks before graduation), grew up
and made lifelong friends. My college
graduation was one of the best days of my life, May 17, 1992 (I graduated just
mere days before my 21st birthday):
Then that came my first forays into real adulthood
(1992-2000): I entered law school (I
left law school; took a gap year then went back again), I got engaged and
married (later separated and divorced), bought a house, became a mother (to the
Teen), went back to school and graduated again, and met who would then become
my second husband. Here are my two graduation photos from John Marshall in 1997 and 2000, respectively:
Just before my 30th birthday, I got married again
and experienced a wonderful honeymoon in Italy.
I had my 30th birthday twice, once in Rome and then again in
Chicago when I got home where my grandmother had prepared all of my favorite
foods! Then just after my 30th
birthday, all hell broke loose. I was
pregnant at the time and ended up in the hospital having emergency surgery on
June 19, 2001, when my (unknown) ectopic pregnancy burst my fallopian
tube. I almost died. To say that was a life-changing event is
truly the understatement of ever. I was
hurt and angry. I had lost my baby and
almost my life. But on the brighter
side, I was able to spend that whole summer with the teen before he started
school in the fall and we had many adventures!
Fast forward (2002+): We had a house built in the suburbs,
was pregnant again in 2003 (after a miscarriage in 2002), gave birth to the
tween in 2004 and was generally ok in life… until it changed again! I turned 35 in 2006 and was feeling rather
blah with things. So the next few years
found me separated (again) and moving with my babies in 2009. Life still went on; I went back to school
again (2009), lost my grandma (2010), turned 40 (2011), began a relationship I
thought would be my last (it clearly wasn’t), moved again and life was good.. until
it wasn’t. Here's my 2011 graduation picture from Governors State:
The rest of the story you
already know: lost my job in 2013, lost
some friends and my relationship (2015), and lost my house (2015), but here I
stand. I gained an awesome church family
(Victory Apostolic), began working on several ministries there, became a board
member for Habitat for Humanity South Suburbs (2015), joined the Top Ladies
(2016), reconnected with some wonderful people and developed some new
friendships as well, and am slowly, but surely, righting my balance.
And that brings us to today, just three weeks after my 45th birthday,
which I celebrated with 50-60 of my friends and family with a Kate
Spade-inspired party! Wasn’t I cute????
When I look back over my life’s journey, like everyone
else’s, it’s not a straight line, but a series of ups and downs as I
experienced the best of times and sometimes the worst of times. But I can truly say that I’ve been blessed
and I indeed have a testimony. I can also
say that I’m content and have joy! No, things aren’t perfect where I stand
right now, not by a long shot. But I can
see the hand of God at work in my life, from having me skip 1st
grade to living with my grandparents to sending me to U of I on a full
scholarship, to passing the bar exam on the first try under truly egregious and mostly non-existent study conditions, to every unhappy ending and each new beginning – brand new mercies everyday!!! Looking back gives me even more hope for the future! My future is so bright, I gotta wear shades!!!
Scripture says: Trust in the Lord with all thine heart and
lean not to thine own understanding. In
all thy ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your path – Proverbs
3:5-6. I don’t know about you, but I am
learning more and more each day to trust God with EVERYTHING, even the things
that seem small, and to listen to the urgings of the Holy Spirit in telling me
what to do. And you know what? He will indeed direct your path! It is a learning curve, for sure, but it gets
easier and easier the more you do it.
I would like to take this time to thank my village – my
family and friends – who have been there through all of it: the good times, the bad times, the happy times, the sad times. As one of my favorite songs by the Mississippi Mass Choir says: "having you there made the difference." So thank you. I appreciate and love my village so much, even though I'm not always able to see or talk to them, I know they are there, rooting for me, praying for me. And it makes it all worth it.
I know that I have indeed been blessed in my 45 years; and I believe that God still has yet to do his greatest work through me. Right now, I am going where He leads me and enjoying each step of the journey. I hope that you will trust Him with your journey too!
Have a blessed week! Oh and I'm still collecting birthday wishes, so Holla @ Darvi!!!
xoxoxo
