Can you recognize the voice of God?

Happy Friday, blogland!  I hope everyone has had a great week. 

We will pause for a moment to remember 9-11... We should never forget.  I will never forget.  I'll always remember exactly where I was and what I was doing when the realization came that this was no ordinary plane crash into a building, but a series of planned attacks.  At the time, I was working in downtown Chicago in a government building, so we were on high alert and dismissed very soon after arrival (and left scrambling to find a way out of downtown and back to the safety of our own neighborhoods).  Even all these years later, it still seems surreal that something like THAT could happen HERE.  I know that sounded a bit like American Elitism, but that was the reaction that day.  It also happens every time a school is attacked by a gunman (although unfortunately, that is becoming more and more the norm) and the horrific shooting a few weeks ago on live television of the news anchor, cameraman and interviewee.  I pray daily that there will be a quick end to the violence and senseless killings in the world.  It zaps one's humanity just a little bit more each time it happens...

As for me and my world:  Packing is no joke (although I have been simultaneously purging things that are in good working order and can be donated to charity, so I'm happy about that part and plan on making my first drop today).  I really feel like I've gotten nothing done although there has been visible progress.   

You know what also isn't a joke?  Trying to realistically move from a 3000 square foot house into one that is approximately 1040 square feet - that is a herculean task!  Not impossible, but you do have to have an open mind and be creative.  I'm sure that will be a future post once I get moved and situated.

I didn't make it to church last Sunday and I've been feeling the effects all week (although I did finish my class on Tuesday night, it's just not the same as being there on Sunday); so I will make sure to be in the place on Sunday morning.  I don't plan on moving churches after the move; it will be a longer than 5 minute drive now, but still close enough for me to attend and be an active member.  That is what I'm looking forward to- becoming active in church again and being close enough for my kids to be active members too.  Our church has over 70 ministries, so there's plenty to do.  I'm hoping to find something that will be a good fit for me.

I'm still kinda in blah mode, trying to snap out of it.  I do appreciate the calls, texts and emails, I do.  I'm just going to need a little time to get myself together with this move and getting the kids situated and transferred, getting unpacked and in some semblance of order all while simultaneously looking for a job - that is quite a lot on my plate - ya know?  So as I ask continually, keep us in your prayers. 

I did look cute one day (even though I look tired):

Anyway, moving on to the subject of this post.  There were two things that have happened in the past week or so that really touched me and I know they were both truly messages from God. 

First, a friend of mine from college, who is also a member of my sorority, sent me an email earlier in the week.  What made it remarkable is that she isn't someone I talk to often (we live in different cities) and we generally chat via Facebook.  The message was very uplifting and encouraging, but the things that stood out for me were these:  1) sometimes as single mothers, we are so used to depending on ourselves  and being independent that it's hard to submit and give things to God to handle; 2) "that to our naked eye, a giant tidal wave is cresting and about to crash down on us like Hurricane Sandy, but when we submit ourselves to God we begin to feel the presence of the Giant invisible hand that is holding back the wave;" and 3) "there is someone watching you and waiting for you to slip up so they can say I told you so - there is someone else who is waiting for you to praise God in the middle of your circumstances so that they can be reassured that they can praise their way out of theirs!"  This may not seem remarkable to you, but it is to me because there is no way that she could/would know anything that is going on in my world at this moment (besides reading here) so I know that this was a message.  And she took the time to send that to me in the midst of making homegoing services for her dad (which I didn't know until this morning).  So to her I say, thank you, friend.  Scratch that.  Thank you to MY friend, Angela Clark-Terrall and I am praying for your family as you deal with your loss.  We will connect soon; you have been great to me over the years and I have never forgotten your kindness.  I love you dearly.

Secondly, a friend from high school who I am connected with these days via Facebook (she lives in another city and state) sent a group of people a message, saying that she was listing all of the people that God told her to pray for and my name was on her list.  Specifically, she stated "Over the next 7 days I will list people that God has asked me to pray for that He deems worth fighting for... What am I fighting for?  Your patience, courage, obedience, strength and so much more."  When I finally made it onto Facebook to read that, it brought tears to my eyes.  Again, this isn't a person I talk to regularly, so only God could have told her to do it.  To her also I say, thank you friend to MY friend, Evelyn Henderson-Barker.  I have always loved and respected your spirit, even back at Morgan Park.  I so appreciate you and I hope that we will see each other again one day so I can properly thank you for thinking of me. 

Now, those may seem to be two random occurrences to you, but for believers, we recognize them as the voice of God.  And all I can say is "I hear You."  Even though I don't understand everything that is happening right now and I feel like I'm drowning, I hear You and I trust You.  The Word says, in Proverbs 3:5-6: 

5Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.

6 In all thy ways acknowledge him, and he shall direct thy paths

 

What do I always say?  I am a Work in Progress, so I struggle sometimes with getting this thing right and I miss the mark.  Often.  But each day, I get a new opportunity to aim for it again.  No, things are not perfect.  They are the furthest from perfect that I have ever experienced in my whole life and I've experienced a lot more than most people, unfortunately.  But, still I press on and I'm gonna be in church this week and every week going forward, thanking Him in advance for my breakthrough when it happens. 

 

So my question for you is can YOU recognize the voice of God and how has HE spoken to you?  Holla @ Darvi!  Be blessed and have a great weekend!

 

Footsteps in the Dark...

Happy Hump Day!  Yes, I know technically that it's after midnight, but since I'm not asleep yet, it's still Wednesday to me!  Guess what?  Remember that "sweltering" weather I was talking about just a few short weeks ago?  Um, yeah.  So now it's fall.  Like for real.  As in jacket weather.  As in I made chili for dinner weather (you know that's fall food, right?).  Tomorrow allegedly it will be warmer and then back to swelter next week.  Gotta love Chicago and its ever-changing weather, right? 

So today  we're going to talk about footsteps in the dark (like the Isley Brothers, reference, eh?).  Or more appropriately, walking in the dark.  Have you ever done that - get up in the middle of the night and stumble around in the dark to go to the restroom or go get a drink of water?  Invariably you walked in to something because your eyes hadn't adjusted to the darkness and it was hard to see.  Maybe it's just me...  
 

The idea of this topic came to me yesterday as I sat in the church parking lot before class doing my homework (don't judge me!).  On the drive there from my contract assignment in the western burbs, me & God had a little chat.  Ok, so it was more like me whining "why, why, why" and God responding back to me through music (which happens a lot when I listen to Gospel music) and then by dropping scripture and other things into my mind.  So I was driving along, had my phone plugged in and on my Pandora station (isn't that the greatest?) and as I whined, a litany of songs came on with His answer.  Next came scriptures.  When I got to the church, I had to write everything down so I wouldn't forget.  And so here we are.

So anyway, I got some bad news yesterday that is a step backwards from where I'm trying to be.  Then another bit of bad news came and I was discouraged.  So as I said, I was whining, literally crying out loud about things, asking why all of this stuff was continuing to happen and asking what in the world was I going to do now??? Have you ever been there? Before I could even finish, a song came on, "It's Only A Test" by Bishop Larry Trotter and Sweet Holy Spirit Choir (you can hear it here).  That made me stop.  Quickly.  That used to be one of my favorite songs back in the day, and what I thought about was how it's sometimes so easy to sing about tests and whatnot when things are going well but we forget about that stuff when we are going through said tests... I'll just drop that right here.

The next song was one I had never heard before, "Joy Will" by Charles Jenkins and it Fellowship MB Church Choir (you can hear it here).  The gist of it is that joy will come in the morning (even when sometimes it feels like one long eternal night and you are stumbling along in darkness most days - see how I tied that in???). 

More songs came on, mostly worship songs:  Amazing by Hezekiah Walker, God is Great by Rickey Dillard and New G, Step Right In by Earnest Pugh, Here I am to Worship by William McDowell, Total Praise by Donnie McClurkin, He Turned It by Rickey Dillard & New G, and Lift Him Up by Hezekiah Walker.  So what do you think happened?  I got so caught up in singing that I stopped whining, number 1, and number 2, I arrived at the church.

But that doesn't mean that my issues were completely out of my mind, as I was working on my homework (stop judging...), I started questioning again. So scriptures arrived next: 

1. Thy word oh Lord is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path - Psalm 119:105
2. Seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all things will be added unto you - Matthew 6:33
3. All things work together for the good of them who love the Lord and are called according to His purpose - Romans 8:28
4. Trust in the Lord with all thy heart and lean not to thine own understanding; in all thy ways acknowledge Him and he will direct your path - Proverbs 3:5

Ouch.  So I take all of that as a not so gentle reminder to get out of my own head and keep focused.  Sometimes that is a very difficult thing to do, especially when things are not going as well as they could be.  So if anyone else out there is going through a rough patch, I hope that you find some comfort in these things like I did yesterday.  I told y'all- the struggle is REAL.

A few months ago my big brother Delvin (remember him?  He writes the blog "My Relationship Lessons" and he's on WVON in Chicago.  You should check him out; his blog can be found here)  mentioned a book he was reading, "Just Enough Light for the Step I'm On" by Stormie O'Martian.  He suggested it for anyone who was going through.  I made a note of it; thought I had it in my library, but did not.  Had to order it from Amazon, but I got it.  Didn't actually pick it up though until last week. The subtitle of the book is "Trusting God in the Tough Times."  Yeah... Here is a photo of it so you can see it:

I'm not done yet, because it's not fluff and I'm reading for understanding, not just content.  I'm only in Chapter 2, but I've already noted and highlighted several things.  It isn't my first book by her; she also wrote Power of Praying Wife and Power of a Praying Husband (those are both great books too, by the way).  I recommend this book for anyone going through tough times and it feels like you are just walking around in the dark with no clear path in front of you.  Kinda like me right now.  Remember that whole work in progress thing? Yep, still progressing...

Let me be clear, I'm not a preacher, evangelist, missionary or any of that stuff.  But I am just a girl (say NOTHING about my age!) who is working on this Christian walk thing one day at a time and who is thankful each day for another opportunity to get it right (because I get it wrong so many times!) and learning, very slowly apparently, to yield.  That is so hard to do, but I'm working on it just the same.

So what should we do?  We keep walking, even though it feels like there's darkness all around us and sometimes the only light is the size of a pen light, certainly not enough to light your whole path.  But that's kinda the point - walking and waiting for the light to guide your next step...

Is there anyone else out there who feels as if they are walking around in the dark, no light in sight?  Or maybe you all have it all together already and I'm by myself.  Perhaps you found your way out of the dark already and want to share your story.  I'm all ears!  Holla @ Darvi - be blessed!!!