While You're Waiting...

Happy Friday, Blogland!  I hope that the Autumn season has been kind to you all!  There's been all sorts of things happening around these parts!  The teen got an early admission and partial scholarship into his first choice college, so I'm gonna be an HBCU Mom!  He also got his driver's license (finally!).  The tween got promoted to honors math and is taking high school level Spanish. So the kids are doing ok (we still have some challenges, but they are ok).  October has been especially busy; unfortunately, I have not been able to squeeze in a Family Fall Outing (but I may be able to sneak one in on Sunday afternoon; we shall see).  It's my second favorite time of the year (Spring is my favorite); I love to watch the leaves change colors.  Here is one of my favorite fall photos:

Anyhoo, y'all know I'm from the Chicago area, right?  Something major is going on up this way - the Cubs are in the World Series!!! Hasn't happened in, well, let's just say a few years... I snapped this photo the other day to show how Chicago was celebrating:

And last but not least, last Saturday would have been my dear grandmother's 99th birthday if she were still living.  It wasn't a sad day; I spent a lot of it just reflecting on her and her legacy.  She loved baseball and would sincerely be over the moon about the the Cubs in the World Series right now!

But, onto our topic (side note:  I hate when I haven't written in awhile; I have so much to catch you all up on and then these posts are incredibly lengthy!  Working on it... I promise!). I have a confession to make:  I. HATE. WAITING.  Ok, wait. Hate is such a strong word. How about this:  I'm not very good at waiting.  Now, I can wait reasonable amounts of time in line, at a restaurant, to vote, to get a gas pump.  But in general?  I just really have a hard time waiting.  Case-in-point:  last week I sent my friend a text message and when I didn't get a response in about 20 minutes, I sent back this:  "Uh, hello?"  And he (gently) reminded me that he was, as I was, in the process of leaving for work and getting those things done and called me impatient. All I could do was laugh, because it's certainly the truth.  I'm not as bad as the man in the Fifth Third commercials (have you seen it?) but still, I'm not a very patient person.  Not even, dare I say it?  With God.

Yeah, I said it.  Look at me, owning my truth!  I am not patient, not even when I'm waiting on God.  Now this isn't all of the time, but it certainly happens when I figure, in my own mind, that it has been long enough and surely He has come to a decision by now!  I know, laughable, right?  But let me give you a very real example.  So, it's been a whopping 1186 days, or, 3 years, 2 months and 28 days since I lost my job (I didn't know those exact numbers, had to use Google to find a calculator for it).  And I'm no closer this year to having a full-time gig than I was a year ago, two years ago or even three years ago.  It's been very frustrating, but also a situation that fuels my impatience.  Because you see, I figure that He has had enough time to move mountains and send me a job!  But, it just hasn't happened like that.  And I won't lie, I am at the edge of worry about the whole thing, because, let's face it, that's a mighty long time to not have a steady income in your household, right?  But, on the other hand, He hasn't failed me yet, so why would he start now?  The Lord's prayer reminds us to ask for our "daily bread" - remember that post?  Here it is if you need a refresher.  So I try to remember that and not worry about days that haven't come and just focus on each new day.

But what do you do while you're waiting?  Real talk - what do you do?  When you look around and it seems like everyone else is getting a new job, a new house, a new car, engaged (and you can't even keep a boyfriend/girlfriend), pregnant, travelling - it can make you feel bad or worse, it can spark feelings of envy or resentment, especially if you feel you are just as "___" fill in the blank as they are.  Bottom line?  You want to know when it's going to be your turn.  Or worse still, you think that God has forgotten about you.  And your shoulders slump and you just want to give up.

This here thing?  I'm speaking from experience.  I've felt all of those things, even as recently as yesterday.  True story, I was on social media, scrolling down my timeline, and ran across a friend celebrating an anniversary and while I was happy for them, I felt some kind of way. Why? Because I'm divorced, and the marriage I thought I would have had by now didn't happen and because I want to celebrate anniversaries too, darn it!  Funny, but true.  

So for real, what should you be doing while you are waiting for your breakthrough, blessing, miracle, testimony, answered prayer - whatever you call it - what should you be doing while you are waiting????  I'm pretty sure that feeling envious and resentful aren't on the list, although those are both very real emotions for when you feel that God has forgotten you. Ouch.  Who wants to feel like they are forgotten?  Unloved?  Abandoned?  No one!  It's not a good feeling at all!  

Know that God doesn't want you to feel those things either; those negative feelings are the trick of the enemy to get you off course and to stop you from a) praying and b) believing in the power of your prayers.  Another trick the enemy uses is the trick of comparison, and social media is a powerful tool that feeds into that (hmm, I will write about that another time). You with me?  Stay with me.

The first thing you must do is to remember these things:  1) God never forsakes you.  2) God is good all the time.  3) Nothing is impossible if you believe.  4) God's word endures forever.  5) It's ALWAYS God's timing, and not yours.  6) Continue to pray. 7) Trust God no matter the circumstances.  8) Stand firmly on his promises.  9) Never give up or give in. 10) Give God praise while you're still waiting on the answers to your prayers.  I also found a blog post devoted to this very topic, entitled "Helpful Ways to Wait on God When You Don't Want To," that did an excellent job of providing some Do's and Don'ts.  You can read it here.

All this is well and good, right?  But the reality is that while you are praying, you will need to add some scriptures to those prayers to help you to stand firm in your faith.  Here are are few you can use for that purpose (these should go right in your war room - whether that's a closet, poster board or notebook):

Psalm 37:7-  Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for Him (NIV).

Psalm 27:13-14- I remain confident of this: I will see the goodness of the Lord in the land of the living.  Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord (NIV).

James 1:12 - Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love Him (NIV).

Hebrews 6:15 - And so, after waiting patiently, Abraham received what was promised (NIV).

Hosea 6:3 - Let us acknowledge the Lord; let us press on to acknowledge him.  As surely as the sun rises, he will appear; he will come to us like the winter rains, like the spring rains that water the earth (NIV).

Psalm 13:5 - But I trust in your unfailing love; my heart rejoices in your salvation (NIV).

Psalm 62:5 - Yes, my soul, find rest in God; my hope comes from Him (NIV).

1 Peter 5:10 - And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm and steadfast (NIV).

Last week, I was listening to Steve Harvey on the radio ('round about 5 am, at the beginning of his show, he provides some very real, spiritual motivation for his listeners), and he said something so profound that I had to make a voice note so that I wouldn't forget what he was saying.  What did he say?  Here it is:  "Pray for strength for the journey while you are waiting.  Don't get knocked off course because oftentimes the blessing comes after the test.  Don't pray for obstacles to be removed, because they are part of the journey.  Both the heavens and the imps hear your prayers, and they will try to knock you off course."  How about I was ready to shout in my car???

I was sharing some of my anxieties with a friend yesterday over email, and she wrote back to me:  "Remember delayed is not denied God is working on some things in your life. God see & know everything you're going through and if you just hold on things will change for your good. God want to do a new thing in your life and a fresh thing in you. You must be grounded to realize the season you're about to come into."  It brought tears to my eyes, and just confirmed that I was supposed to write this post (the topic came to me a few weeks ago but I'm just getting around to it) and also gave me the will to go on just one more day.  

Last, but not least, I found a prayer on Pinterest (yes, Pinterest) that I encourage you to put in your war room as well (I certainly intend to).  It is originally from here, https://heathercking.org/, and it is called "A Prayer for When You Are Waiting" and it goes like this:

My Father,

I know I am impatient, so prone to worry, to give up, to lose hope.

Help me to rest in Your promises today.

In this season of waiting, renew my joy in this moment so that I do not miss Your presence in this place.  Thank You for being with me and for never giving up on me.  Thank You for always working for my good and for Your glory even when I can't see.  

In Jesus' name, Amen.

So hold on just a little while longer and wait on the Lord.  I'm waiting - and praising Him while I do.  What about you?  You know what to do - Holla @ Darvi and let me know what you do while you're waiting!  Have a wonderful weekend and as always, be blessed.  Here's some music to take us out:

xoxoxo 

~ Darvi

All about that GRACE... (to be grounded)

Hey there, it's me again!  By the time you read this, it will be March- this year is going by! 

I want to begin by saying thank you to the overwhelmingly positive response to my super transparent post on Monday.  That was not an easy thing for me to do, but, I am, and have always been a firm believer that the things we go through are to bless others with our testimonies and I felt led to share it (uh, not when I first started writing, but well, yeah, you get the idea!). 

My class is progressing; we skipped a week because our instructor was unable to make it, so instead of Week 6 we just finished Week 5.  And let me tell you this - it is a lot of work to truly study the Bible!  It's a lot of reading, re-reading, homework and outside books.  A lot of reading!!!  This first leg of the class (10 weeks) will end this month, then we have two weeks off, pick back up in April and go through June.  Y'all just pray my strength in the Lawd - 34 weeks total!!!

Anyway, my attempts at humor aside, today's post, in keeping with the theme of the previous two, is still about being grounded - we will take a look at Bishop TD Jakes' watch night sermon from 2015, "Grace to be Grounded."  Now, of course, he started his series with this sermon (and there are two other "grounded" sermons that I won't discuss here but they can be found on you tube or on his website), but I wanted to talk about being grounded first and work my way backwards.  Hopefully it will make sense to you as you read on...

Like my play on words?  I have young people in the house, so I have heard the Meghan Trainor song, "All about that Bass," and so I thought it would be pretty cool.  I assure you that both the Tween and Teen think it's kinda lame... Anyway, I digress - GRACE.  

It is defined in the bible dictionary as follows (found here):

Biblically, grace is unmerited favor. It is God's free action for the benefit of His people. It is different from justice and mercy. Justice is getting what we deserve. Mercy is not getting what we deserve. Grace is getting what we do not deserve. In grace we get eternal life, something that, quite obviously, we do not deserve, but because of God's love and kindness manifested inJesus on the Cross, we receive the great blessing of redemption.

Grace is God's Riches At Christ's Expense. Grace rules out all human merit (Rom. 11:6). It is the product of God that is given by God because of who He is and not because of who we are. It is the means of our salvation (Eph. 2:8-9). We are no longer under the Law but under grace (Rom. 6:14). (See 1 Cor. 15:11, Rom. 5:2, 15-20, 2 Cor. 12:9, and 2 Cor. 9:8).

Got it?  So let's move on to the sermon - Grace to be Grounded.  You can watch the sermon here.  The sermon text was Psalm 1:1-3 (sidenote- I have such a problem remembering when Psalms should be plural or singular, so if I'm wrong, roll with it...).  It's short, so I will actually include it this time.  

Psalm 1:1-3 (NASB):  

1 How blessed is the man who does not walk in the counsel of the wicked, 

   Nor stand in the path of sinners,

   Nor sit in the seat of scoffers!

2 But his delight is in the law of the Lord,

   And in His law he meditates day and night.

3 He will be like a tree firmly planted by streams of water,

   Which yields its fruit in its season

   And its leaf does not wither;

   And in whatever he does, he prospers.

I love this passage of scripture, by the way.  It is not something I was overly familiar with prior to hearing this sermon, but afterwards?  It has joined the ranks of my faves and hopefully you will see why in short order!

Sermon Notes (beginning with scripture overview):

• Meditate day and night = consistency
• He who does this shall be like a tree; God will put you in a spot to have an unlimited supply of what you need to finish what He set before you to accomplish
• Deeper roots = more and more raw resources 
• Like a tree with roots: position to connect with the resources needed to sustain everything He will bring out of you
• Stabilize yourself - it's closer than you think it is
• Live in position, not condition
• His fruit, His season
• You need to hear you say:  "Blessed is the Man"
• Blessed= position
• We sometimes don't recognize grace because of our problems
• The presence of trouble does not destroy the potential for triumph! (you'd better say that again, Bishop!)
• Your leaves shall not wither, He will stop the loss!
• We have to be a guard over grace; it tells a blessed man what not to do:  
• Grace must be guarded - be quiet sometimes!
• Stay out of the counsel of the ungodly; anything that doesn't line up with God's purpose and people who don't understand your destiny
• Be careful who you let influence you
• friends mean well, trying to protect you, but God can bless you in the storm (though he slay me, yet will I trust Him (Job 13:15))
• Be more disciplined
• Don't be bitter
• For what God is getting ready to do, you need to be GROUNDED
• Moving around is cancelling your blessing
• You need to be grounded in faith, behavior and in the Word
• Put on the whole armor of God to stand still!
• Just stand there, no matter what comes
• If your feet are planted in the house of the Lord, you will flourish in his gardens (See Psalm 92:13)
• The enemy is trying to fight you for your ground
• God has given you things that don't look like they're yours, but stand your ground!
• The more you stand, the more fruit you will have (gifts):  
• finances, relationships, opportunities
• God's going to put and position you around something too big for you (and it might scare you)
• Specific instructions for being grounded:
• Faith
• Prayer life
• Commitment
• Settle down!
• You can't get to His will your way
• You need to be grounded for the harvest; it's coming!

And he closed with having the congregation say this:  "My fruit, My season!"

As usual, I'm sure I didn't do the sermon justice, these are just my notes that I'm sharing with you.  But do you see why I felt that this was such a powerful sermon??? And I have to stop here and thank my birthday twin, Charlotte, again, for sharing this with me.  This was such a powerful series that literally changed my outlook on 2016.  I really do encourage you to go check out the sermon itself using the link above.

So what did I take away from the sermon?  I'm glad you asked (my favorite Rev. Meeks' statement from my days at Salem)!  So here's what Darvi got out of it (besides the notes above):

1) Pray.  Always.  Without Ceasing.  Always.  Pray.  This is how we develop relationship with God; prayer is a conversation.  I promise when I was younger and used to hear the old folks say that, I had no idea what they were talking about!  But, I'm older now, and I get it, I truly do.  As your prayer life grows, it will indeed be a conversation - He will speak to you.  You just have to learn to listen and be open to the many ways in which He speaks.

2) Read the Word.  Not just a cursory, random glance, but really read/study.  I've found some really nice devotionals and bible studies on Pinterest; you can do a search by subject matter and that is one way to get going with it.  

3) Believe.  There's a song that goes "what God has for me, it is for me."  You can hear it here.  You have to truly and deeply within your heart of hearts believe that.  No matter what it looks like now.  If He told you it was yours, it's yours.  But you have to activate your faith and not falter in your belief in His word.  This is hard and I stumble here all the time.  Just being honest... I always want to believe, but then something will happen that causes me to doubt and I have to start all over again.  I'm sure I have missed out on some things just because I faltered at the last minute.  

4) Be committed.  To prayer, to reading/studying, to your faith, in your church attendance, in your tithing - whatever it is, be committed to doing it.  Your commitment should be evident; no one should question it.

5) Stand!!!  Every time I hear this, I think of my good friend's mother, Auntie Barbara, singing this at church when I was younger.  "After you've done all you can, you just stand."  Here's the Donnie McClurkin song, because it is such an awesome song, here.  What does that mean?  It means, get out of the way, sit yourself down somewhere, get rooted and stay there.  Stand does not mean do nothing; it means to do whatever God has told you to do while you wait on Him to bring his promises to you to fruition.  Also a thing I struggle with, because I'm impatient.  But I've learned, just as I'm sure many of you have, that He has a way of making you sit still. I'm just saying... Remember, His Fruit, His Season...

So my friends, if being grounded requires us to activate faith, prayer, commitment and to stand in order to receive things that we don't deserve, how does it happen?  Because surely we all know that we don't deserve anything, right?  The answer is simply this:  Grace.  It is by his Grace that we can even get in the position to be grounded to receive His blessings of our faith and finances.  If you missed those, you can read them here (Grounded in Faith and Grounded in Finances).  

So, my question for you is this:  Who is ready to be like a tree, firmly planted and bearing fruit????  I know I am!  If that's you too, Holla @ Darvi and let's talk about it!  As always, Be Blessed!!!

xoxo 

In battle...

Dear Blogland,

I'm sorry I haven't been more faithful in recent days.  Know that it isn't because I don't want to be, but more that I am struggling with some pretty heavy things at the moment, a battle if you will.  A battle in which I am being hit on every side, to the point that I am discombobulated and exhausted at the end of nearly every day.  And I feel like I'm fighting alone, which is no fun either.  I am constantly in conversational prayer, trying to make some sense of it all, and waiting on answers and confirmation.

So this morning, as I briefly surfed my Pinterest feed, I came across these things which I will share with you today.  May they encourage someone else as they have encouraged me today.

1) "God can restore what is broken and change it into something amazing.  All you need is faith."  See Joel, Chapter 2

2) "Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know."  Jeremiah 33:3

3) "Make your anger so expensive no one can afford it.  And make your happiness so cheap, that most can get it for free."  - Unknown

4) "Fear is a self-imposed prison that will keep you from becoming what God intends for you to be.  You must move against it with the weapons of faith and love."  Rick Warren

Now don't mistake my battles for a life without blessings - God is STILL in the blessing business and He keeps on blessing me even in the midst of my storms.  The thing to remember, and what I tell myself every day, is that the battle is not mine, it's God's.  My job is to stay faithful and pray for His will, direction and the victory!

That's it, that's all.  Pray for me as I pray generally for you.  Side note:  if you do want me to add you to my prayer list specifically, then you can Holla @ Darvi by email at: heydarvi@gmail.com.  I would love to have your name on my answered prayers list!

I am heading off to a crafting retreat - I need the break!  I hope to have a praise report real soon, a victory in the battle!!!  Enjoy your weekend and be blessed!!!

Some thoughts on the notion of "Perfection..."

Happy Tuesday (yeah, I know.  I'm getting really, really bad about not pre-writing, but sometimes what I PLAN to write about isn't what I'm LED to write about.  So just bear with me sometimes, I am learning to be obedient... [that is another post entirely!]).  

I hope that everyone is doing well.  I'm in a hectic time right now, lots of things happening at once and not enough time to get everything done!  Which means that emails don't get sent, calls don't get returned, texts are forgotten and blog posts aren't written...

What does all that mean?  It means that try as I may, no matter how hard I try, I'm not perfect.  I don't always have it all together.  Some days (ok, this is me, EVERY day) I start with a grand to-do list and all these ideas on what I'm going to accomplish that day.  Yeah. Then the Tween has an epic slow down and my morning plans are shot (happened today). Or I run into an old friend and we end up chatting for an hour when I (finally) dropped the Tween off at camp (also happened today).  So my morning start got pushed back almost 2 hours, and I have a full afternoon already (not to mention another last minute thing thrown into the mix this morning but I had to add it, class tonight and yesterday's undone tasks!)... you get the idea.

So I'm not perfect.  It's one of my major faults.  I'm actually just, wait for it... HUMAN.  And I accept that.  In fact, I accepted it a long time ago.  It just seems that other people I come into contact with can't, don't and won't accept it.  They are unwilling to extend the benefit of the doubt.  They appear to be unable to accept shortcomings and humanness.  Newsflash: the last time I checked, we were all human (unless I'm in contact with some alien life forms that I was unaware of...).  Meaning that we are all imperfect beings.

What does this mean?  It means, folks need to adjust their unrealistic expectations.  You know, those that are quick to demand perfection but in return expect grace for their missteps, mistakes and imperfectness.  The idea that real life doesn't happen to other people, just themselves.  Those that are quick to point out someone's shortcomings and criticize, but are unwilling to lend a hand or become a part of the solution.  You know those people...we all do.

So today, August 11, 2015, I make this grand announcement to the world:  I AM NOT PERFECT!  There, I said it!  Nor will I pretend to be... I can only be what I am, human, and with that comes mistakes and shortcomings.  If you are to be in my world on any level, then you must accept and expect that.  And either you will extend grace, mercy and forgiveness in those instances, or not.  There's always a choice.  

You know I love a good list, so here's a good place for one.  Reasons why you should accept humanness in others:

1) The Lord's Prayer says:  "...forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us..."   How do you expect grace and forgiveness if you won't give it????

2) Which leads to number two, you never know when you will need grace for your humanness... Let that marinate for a minute.

3)  The bible also says this:  "You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye."  Matthew 7:5 (NIV)

(Image from here).

Which means that you should examine yourself before you examine others.

4) My grandmother used to say this:  "every time you point one finger at someone else, there are three point back at you."  

5) Those who live in glass houses should not throw stones.  Enough said.

6) Last but not least, no one is perfect.  It's as plain and simple as that!  I just saw this on Pinterest last night and it actually inspired this post (along with some real-life drama going on):

(Image from Pinterest, but originally from here).

So what am I saying?  Cut folks some slack sometimes!!!  You never know what a person is going through, just by looking at them.  Everyone doesn't wear their issues on their sleeves and smiles hide a lot of pain and stress sometimes.  

Take me for instance.  I know there are people who think/feel that I have disappeared or just fell off the face of the earth right now.  No, not so much.  But I am dealing with some life things at the moment that are terribly important and take everything within me to manage. Like this:  today marks 741 days of unemployment for me.  That is pretty major.  But I thank God that we are still standing (bent at this point, but standing, nonetheless).  That being said, when you say your prayers (if you are a prayer-type of person), say one for me and my family that our finances continue to hold during this season (and I thank you in advance).

Ok, got that off my chest, and maybe it will help someone who is going through this also from the perspective of being judged or maybe you are the judger.  Either way, I hope it inspires you to examine yourself.

On a side note, this past weekend I had the opportunity to spend some time with a group of talented ladies that I just "met" via Meetup, The Creative Southsiders.  It was a pleasure to meet them and see the things they were working on (forgot to take pictures - next time) and it gave me some much needed downtime as well.  I worked on the wall piece for the new baby (unfinished because her name hasn't been finalized yet), and some scrapbook pages. I really needed the  break, so many thanks to The Creative Southsiders for having me!!! Here's what I worked on:

Here's the wall art for the new baby; I saved space for her name and more embellishments.  I used paper from American Crafts Play line (from 2007...), some bling trim from Michael's, the "princess" sticker from an old Pebbles kit, the 3-D princess sticker is also from Pebbles, cardstock from Bazzill and Die Cuts with a View, flowers from Prima and Bazzill and butterfly stickers from Jolee's.

This page is adorbs!  It features my nephew and great nephew!  I used primarily papers from Heidi Swapp's September Skies line, cardstock from Close to My Heart (outdoor denim, my all-time favorite navy cardstock), stickers and flag pennant from Basic Grey, foam letters and ribbon from American Crafts, some small star stickers from Studio Calico, and a random star that I had in my stash (I think it's from Creative Imaginations).  It's my favorite page of the day!

I'm not quite finished with this page; but I only had limited supplies with me.  This features the Tween's very first eye appointment in 2009!  I used papers by Carta Bella (So Noted Collection), cardstock from Close to My Heart (bamboo, my all-time favorite neutral cardstock), a flair button from Basic Grey, and a really old flower embellishment.  Still needs a little more embellishing though...

Welp, you know that to-do list I was talking about???  I have to get to back to it now.  Thank you so much for reading my blog and for your encouraging comments, emails, texts and Facebook messages!  I am humbled that my little posts inspire folks sometimes.  So thank you.  I am on bloglovin' now, so you can follow me there.  It's actually very neat, you can follow all of the blogs you read in one place.  Check it out here.  

But back to the subject of this post just for a second.  Just remember to give folks the benefit of the doubt sometimes, you never know what they are dealing with.  That's all I'm saying. Do you agree?  Holla @ Darvi!  Be Blessed!!!